There is very little that is righteous in losing a ball game in which you out hit the opponent by a greater than 2-1 margin. There is very little that is righteous about hitting into 6 double plays as a team. Actually, there is absolutely nothing righteous about any of that. Much in the same way as there is absolutely nothing righteous about jorts. So as we have established that absolutely nothing about last night’s game was righteous and that jorts are an abomination (clearly not righteous,) I think it only fitting that I award the rdotg to the ******* in section 230 who was rocking jorts, a short sleeve shirt and Velcro shoes. This Bud’s for you. My only regret is that I didn’t get a picture of this guy. At first I thought he might be “special” (based solely on the fact he was wearing any type of shorts and a short sleeve shirt in temperatures that dipped into the 30′s,) so taking his photograph would have just been wrong. However as the game wore on it became obvious he wasn’t “special,” just a clueless 40 something douche. Couldn’t help but notice he was single. I wonder why that is? Just gonna leave this here…
If you’re reading this and you have to pause and think about what you were wearing last night at the game, guess what…it was you. Do yourself a favor, lose the jorts. Don’t even give them to a shelter because making needy people wear jorts is just cruel and unusual. Burn ‘em. Seriously, light those bastards up and have a bonfire. You can thank me later.