Me vs. Kids and wife

S

Suburban Cowboyz

PR Addict
Hi. Those of you who know me are well aware that I LOVE riding, camping and racing. However, my 2 boys (8 and 6) could care less. They would MUCH rather play video games. However, when I consider selling their bikes they flip out. My wife hates MX also and I do not get ANY support from her as well - if it were Disney World than I would be a hero. This family has been to Disney World more times than I can remember, but I have to twist arms to go riding - yet when they are out there they cannot get enough. Every day I hope that they will convert to the MX side, but it just doesn't happen. I feel like just giving up on life. MX is what I live for and I feel severely guilty about going without them - to the point that I usually stay home. I want to go to NC / SC over Christmas Break and of course NO ONE in my family wants to go. I just cannot believe this. Please help, I am so depressed. Thanks. Rich
 
If you're taking care of time at home, and your riding time isn't taking away from family time, you need to balance it with time for YOU. I had a tough time when my son started pulling away and not wanting to go (or go with me) to where I had to look out for my time. Mine was considerably older, (when he was 15 or 16 and I became an idiot), but I found I had more fun hanging out with people my own age. If it's all one-sided, it will cause conflicts down the road. I still have tough time going by myself (because I don't know anyone here in NJ yet), but have a ball once I'm there. You should ride til YOU have had enough, and decide you're done.
 
I have three kids . My oldest is Jack age 15 . He loves to ride but the other two could care less they are 8 and 5 . My wife will not go to the races . She will ride once or twice a year in the backyard on her DRZ 125 I bought her. We have been able to get away (Jack and I) to 15 plus a year events including racing and practicing. We hit all the big events like Vet -fest . Mid -ohio. Lorretta qualifiers.
When I am home we go to church every sunday. Most of our events are Saturday if I can help it ....that way I am home on Sunday for family stuff. My wife will not go on trips with other girls or her mom alone to ballance out time away. Somehow we have managed to put riding in our lifestyle and everyone is happy. When we go on winter vacation we bring one bike to share and no trailer . We schedule only 2 or so days riding per week to keep vacations ballanced.
Good luck with your kids . I find that if my son does not want to upkeep the bike and contribute to washing ,cleaning and prepping his bike then I wont let him ride. It is making him want to ride more after he shares the workload . My wife does not hunt or ride or even like to go to sporting events . That is my life ! Somehow we are each satisfied with what we have. I have to say that having GOD in the center of our family makes us closer and more empathatic to each others needs. We are thankful to have our health and each other and even our dirt bikes. For now things are running smoothly.
 
Rich I agree with Chris. You HAVE to find something to do as a family also. My 12 y/o and wife want nothing to with MX. We have a boat and jetski 5 minutes from our house that we use every week, that makes everyone happy. Now my oldest boy and myself can go riding and not get the evil eye from the war dept.
 
It's a tough thing to juggle, but family has to come first, riding second. My wife and girls had no interest in riding but my son and I were gone every weekend we could fit in as well as Wed. night practice. He is 23 and in college now and I cherish the time we spent together and the memories we created. They are some of the best times of my life. My wife was cool with us being together doing guy stuff she called it. I think life is short and you have to find me time too. So I say ride when you can because you may not always be able to. Good luck.
 
I have been racing since i was 15, with a break of racing 1990-1999 because of a knee injury at amherst oct 1990, took time to have 2 more children during that time, remarried and got back to racing as much as possible with work and weather and family time, my wife goes to all my races, only twice she has'nt gone. Its hard she works i work to take a full day on sunday to go to the track is alot to ask but she is the greatest to go with me ( never really good to go alone ) At my amherst accident in 1990 my oldest was with me he was 13 yrs old it was a bad knee injury 3 surgery's i had to drive home 2 hrs with my knee wasted with my son, he and the other riders there loaded my bike and stuff so i could go home, my son never interested in racing nor my other children, but come every so often to support me when possible, but every fathers day they all come that day to be with me. This yr was at western reserve. taking private time to do family things is important to balance the racing, there is nothing else for me but to race i live,sleep,eat thinking of it. By the way can't wait for jan.7 , my B-Day and the first race of supercross 2012. If racing is in your blood like mine you can't quit its my weekend out of the day to day stress of life, it keeps me sain. I am fortunate in the most support i get to keep racing. GOOD LUCK Oh by the way i take my wife to vegas to keep it even. LOL. Merry Christmas All. Read Jody's Box in the new issue of mxa mag. its right there what your talking about.
 
My first boy didn't care to ride till 15.Then at 16 he wanted to race. He is since finished and moved on at 23. I have an extremely talented 13 year old who likes to ride, but not race, although this has changed somewhat starting in September. Just give the kids time. They usually come around when kids in school tell them how "Lucky" they are to have new dirt bikes! Sometimes at 6 or 7, the kids just don't like or understand the competition thing. As they get older , they understand what completion is all about. Some relish it, as in my kids cases, or they turn to something else and they never ride or race again.

The wife thing is hard. My wife went with me for 22 years. She has had enough and would rather ride her CBR than go to a race. She goes about 4 or 5 times a year now. I have pretty much ridden everywhere in the US, and she has been with me for 24 of the 35 years of my racing. I miss her going with me, but that is life. We run a large HVAC business, so we work, sleep eat together 5 days a week. She likes her own time now that we are getting older.
 
Personally I always had an uphill battle over racing with both my parents & then my wife who I call the anti-cross for many years.
Crazy part is I met her at a race track back in 1980 as she was there with her sister was dating the owner at the time.

Guess the trick is finding the right balance the works for you & your family. Time apart is a good thing once in a while as people need to
do their own separate things.

My wife backed off a few years ago after seeing how many of the guys I worked with at one job with hung at a local bar after work.
She could not believe they had families, how much time they spent there & suddenly realized going riding or racing a few times a month was
not so bad after all. Of course I threw in more than a few times...at least I am not at the bar getting hammered everyday.

My youngest daughter has had an interest in riding & racing since 2002 which was great for me but not so good at home sometimes.
I used to get hammered with everything from are you trying to get her paralyzed or killed which was unfair as you can get hurt at any sport.
She even got interested in the AHRMA bikes when I did a few years ago & that is all she is riding right now.
We have had many great father and daughter racing weekends & I would not trade that for anything.

Maico Mark
 
Thanks guys. You all have given some valuable insight. Before the wife and i had kids, she would grade papers while I practiced! Talk about a dream come true. But after a few injuries and 3 kids later she is not there in my MX life anymore. At this time I don't know how it will turn out. For me, I am a Sr. 2 C rider and happy to be there. The older I get, the more involved in it I want to be. I love the whole aspect of traveling, camping etc.
 
Yea sometimes the family gets burned out. My mom hasn't been to a race since I was on a supermini. And before that she was at every race. Then she started just going to big races Loretta's mini o's, now none at all.

I get where you're coming from. I know my dad is bummed that my little brother wants very little to do with riding. He's all about Xbox. I think my dad liked working on bikes and watching me race than he does riding himself. It's really crazy how personalities in your family differ so much. My brother is polar opposit of me. The competition thing hinders my brother too I think. He's not real aggressive or competitive, he's just like eh yea whatever!

I guess you just find that happy medium and roll with it.
 
You need to stick with it!
This is your passion, and at the very least your teaching them to stick with that which you are passionate about. It's a valuable life lesson for them. Even if you have to do it alone for a time.

Your kids are going to grow up and move on with there own lives, but they will return, in many ways.

As all of you grow older, you won't even realize it but they will gradually begin to see and be proud of the fact that, their old man is a motocross rider. They will have a sense of pride in that. It set's you apart from most others our age. And the older you get, the more it will hold true. And who knows, they just might decide that they want to grow up to be like Dad.
 
New classes to start at MX153 but not for MX riders. Say what? Holly will be putting together classes for the wives/girl friends of MX'ers. Guest appearances from Denise Henry, Jennifer Elliott, Tina Sams and Tawni Weber will help exemplify what it means to be a moto chick. More details to follow.
 
Rocket, this idea is not mine. Mr. Briarcliff paid Holly an extremely nice comment at this past weekends gathering along the lines of her being a moto chick and teaching other riders significant others on how to support their rider. After reading this poor guys post makes me appreciate Holly even more.
 
This is Moto "Mom" .......I tell my son allllll the time.....Bud if you wanna do this when you get older you better date a chick that races/raced like your Daddy did....These girls will tell ya they like it then....."They HOOK ya" and well.... things change :eek:( And I also tell him how lucky we are as a FAMILY, that we have all this time together, the campin, the travelin, the sleepin ONE foot from each other in the 17 year old toy hauler, the hangin at the camp fire swapin funny stories from the day on the dirt. We are truly blessed to enjoy these things together as a family, so I feel for you boys havin trouble gettin the loved ones involved.. My suggestion is....maybe plan a really really fun "Camping Trip" with swimming and hiking and bingo....and Oh yea , bonus you just happen to be able to ride there also.....YOU swim and craft with them, They ride with you :eek:)

Hey dmx153...since you called me out by name to be part of Holly's New "Help clinic" I want to host a class called "How to work for your Man/son's gate/race fee".......That seems to be my area of expertise!......I can see the woman RUNNING to sign up now.....lol
 
Bill480 said:
I'll goto SC or NC with ya over the winter!
Click to expand...
We are heading down over Christmas break to a new place called Hog Heaven. Also going to go to 5 Points and maybe NCMP, but we don't like NCMP as much. Weinert's new training facility will be open December 31st. It is at the old Crystal Coast complex. Hog Heaven looks sweet and a friend of mine just got back from there and sent me over some pictures while he was sown there, and it looks awesome.

We are also planning a trip with a whole lot of my Facebook/Thumpertalk friends in February over mid winter break around Prez day. All these tracks are along the NC coast, as are the ones above, so weather isn't a problem, but last year a couple did get 2 inches of snow once, but that is a very rare occurrence along the coast. I know many of the track owners down that way, and I can even get Phil to turn on the lights at 5 Points so we can ride at night!!

Just PM me!
 
After trying for several years and buying my youngest new bikes as he grew, he just wasn't that interested. Then after not having riden it for about 2 years i decided to sell because I could use the money. I guess it was the wrong thing to do? He hasn't been too happy about it, but he also wouldn't give me the time of day (15 yo.).

I used to take off for the day with my buds when the kids were here and didn't want to go, but now I regret it. I guess I should have put my need to get away from the real world aside. It's a tough gig.
 
Moto mom it's funny you say that. My gf really doesn't want anything to do with racing. She likes camping though. But I can't stand camping without the trailer a Dirtbike track and motorcycles. I'm hoping this year she likes the trips to qualifiers and regionals. Either way I'll force her to Loretta's lol. Time will tell but I pray that she likes it.

I told her mx is like a high class campground.
 
I can not beleive what I am reading.....Mom and kids don't like racing or riding motorcycles???? Must be a Ohio thing.... No Just Kidding... I am One of the fortunate fathers thats has 2 boys that have started riding at the age of three and started racing not to long after... My wife was around bikes and quads her whole life and even has some cool pictures of some old Bultacos in her parents field with a couple of guys that go by the name of Gary and David Bailey....She was never aloud to ride but was always watching...When the time came for my oldest to start racing,she made a phone call to Gary Bailey and thats where Spence went to learn.She always told him that he wasnt aloud to race,but after a few times watching him ride she gave in...After my freak injury and Parker ready to race, I decided it was time for me to step down as a racer and watch the next generation take over.... I have a hard time even thinking that we as a family would be anywhere else than racing TOGETHER...yes we do alot of other sports from Golf, Basketball,Wrestling,Hunting, etc... but we are alway not into it as much as we are into motocross...The Friends we have made and the memories we will have will last forever,as I often refer to the ones I have from my days as a youth rider with my family...
 
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